my spotify playlist masterlist for all your quarantine needs

• for lazy hazy afternoons
• for when it’s past midnight and you need to dance to something trashy and pop
• for when you can’t remember why you are still here
• for rainy nights where you think too deeply
• for when you’re only fifty percent human and the other fifty percent is something more feral and monstrous
• for anxiety attacks and breakdowns
• for when you only want to listen to sad white men singing about sad things
• for when you’re drinking soda and the bubbles make your nose tingle
• for feeling weightless
• for when you’re walking on an uneven pavement and the sun is beating down your neck
• for simultaneous crying and bopping
• for when one more sad song might make you scream
• for your bruised and tender soul
• for pretending you’re in an upbeat indie electropop band with your three best friends and you’re all gay
• for unconventional alternative love songs
• for when you need a reminder of what living feels like because everything feels grey
• for pretending you can afford all the things you added to your cart on sephora
• for when you’re breaking your own heart
  
• for drifting off into another world at night
  
• for when you’re feeling stuck but also hopeful but also tired but also excited
• for when you need your heartbeat to slow back down
• for believing in love again
• for daydreaming on a hillside under a soft sunset
• for when you realize she has the most beautiful smile and looking at it hurts
• for when you need the warmest coziest hug
  
• for feeling as small as dust and as infinite as the universe, all at once
• for when your heart needs to feel soft and easy and happy
• for seeing the person you’re in love with and realizing you need to let them go and start moving on
  
• for when you feel like you’ve been set on fire
• for putting on makeup in the morning even though it feels like there’s no point but also you just want to look really fucking cute for no reason
  
• for when you need to be eased into pulling yourself together
• for summer days laying outside on your front lawn daydreaming about lemonade
• for pretending you’re a depressed mermaid who lives in the arctic ocean
  
• for when you’re daydreaming about the future so that you can forget for a moment how unhappy you are
  
• for being transported back to 2012 when you were trashy and emo and cringey as hell
• for staring in the mirror in the dark and thinking about the experience of womanhood
• for punching walls and smashing people’s heads in
• for cutting fruit to make into a cobbler because fuck you want to eat something cozy and comforting then
• for when things are … not going quite how you thought they would
• for when your life feels like an actual movie and you need to soundtrack it
  
• for unwinding from a stressful day
• for when you feel like a ghost running through a forest while it’s raining and foggy
• for when you actually yell back for the first time and the adrenaline pumps through your blood
• for when it’s raining outside and you’re staring out the window longing to run in the rain but instead you’re stuck inside
• for feeling like you’re right inside of a black hole
• for when you’re anxiety says something stupid to you and for once you know it’s wrong and you fight back
• for when you need to feel bigger than what you are in that moment
• for when you put your trust in someone and you’re terrified
• for feeling inexplicably sad and upset and lonely
• for knowing it’s okay to cry
• for when it’s late at night and you can’t stop thinking about him
• for haunting unholy songs that help you pretend that you’re a demon
• for breathing properly, just when it feels like you’ll never be able to again
• for feeling unformed and unfinished and unknown
• for almost being at peace but something is nagging at you
• for just really needing to hear james blake’s voice
  
• for when you love someone so much but you can’t talk to them because the words don’t come out
  
• for being a teenager at the fucking-things-up-and-breaking-rules stage of a coming-of-age film

Damn okay now it’s Filicide as well. Today has really been A Whole Thing. 3.5/10

Obviously we’re all now On Wei Wuxian’s Side and Lan Wangji Loves That For Us, but at the same time… Wow we’re all very quick to Completely Believe these Random Strangers and maybe we should Think About Thi—No? Vicious Mob? I guess Vicious Mob is good too. 4.5/10

Everybody is being Remarkably Cavalier about his brother’s potential murder here. Lan Wangji is beginning to think that most of these people… may be Kind Of Terrible. 3/10

Can’t help but notice that when it was Wei Wuxian that we were all Chanting About nobody wanted to take him alive but now that it’s the Murderous Incest Guy we’re all keen on Fair Trials but okay. 2.5/10

No big deal just doing three bows with the bestie. Showing Respect to the Jiang Clan Ancestors and Doing Absolutely Nothing Else. 9/10

Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian take it in turns to be Offended on Each Others’ Behalf. Lan Wangji has brought his Most Angry Eyebrows to this fight and he is Not Afraid to Use Them. 2.5/10

Lan Wangji gets his Full Face involved to express just how much he Disapproves of Jiang Wanyin and his Bullshit. Jiang Wanyin is so close to suffering some Serious Violence if he doesn’t Get His Hands Off. 2/10

Look at his Eyes. The Absolute Panic. The Concern. That’s Not Where Blood Belongs, Wei Wuxian, what are you Doing. 1.5/10

Lan Wangji is suddenly having A Lot of Regrets about some things he said A Few Years Ago. As if all the Regrets he previously had Weren’t Enough. 1/10

Wei Wuxian is so Good and Noble and Self-Sacrificing and– I’m sorry 50%?? God he’s So Annoying. Why does he Do These Things to Lan Wangji’s Peacefulness. 2.5 /10

Quiet loathing of Jiang Wanyin intensifies. 2/10

Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian both know that this is Thievery. This is an Illegal Lotus Pod. A Crime is being committed before his Very Eyes. 3/10

So this is a Life of Crime. It’s not so bad. Lan Wangji could get used to this. 8.5/10

Lan Wangji got too wrapped up in his Life of Crime and briefly forgot about the Life or Death Situation that his brother is in. 3.5/10

Lan Wangji is just Extremely Impatient to get into the city please read nothing further into his Facial Expression or General Stompiness. 3/10

Wei Wuxian should Stay Right Here and just Gently Hold Lan Wangji’s Hand For A Bit. This is Ideal. 10/10

He’s right, Lan Wangji. You Idiot. You Buffoon. A Chicken? What Were You Thinking. 1/10

Two Chickens. Yes!! Now We’re Talking. You’re a Genius, Lan Wangji 10/10

Wei Wuxian? Telling Lan Wangji to be Good? My how the Tables have Tabled. 10/10

He’s So Angry to have his Good Time utterly Ruined. Completely Unacceptable. The least this Spooky Bitch could do is Stand Still and Let Himself Be Stabbed. 1/10

Lan Wangji takes us on a roller coaster ride of all the Major Emotions: Breaking the Rules, Bunnies, Regretting Everything, and Sad. A truly impressive range. 5/10

Good. Tonight has been a Good Night. Stole some Chickens (for Love), did a Tiny Bit of Vandalism (for Fun), didn’t let Some Jerk kill Wei Wuxian (for Love). Plus he got to talk about So Many Feelings. Definitely nothing to feel Embarrassed or Ashamed about later! 10/10

The Shame just rolling off him in Waves. Look at that Averted Gaze. That Clenched Jaw. Someone please save this man from the Consequences of his Actions. 2.5/10

Absolute Panic. Lan Wangji teeters on the verge of a Qi Deviation or maybe just Screaming Internally and Running Away. 1.5/10

Something about this Thick Fog and Portentous Atmosphere tells Lan Wangji that they’re in Flashback City, Population: Ghosts. Time to make himself Scarce and fight a Mystery Man for a while. 4/10

Wèi yīng...

i love that whenever wei wuxian gets accused of a crime his default defense is “i didnt do it because if i did i would have a done a better job”